I have mulled getting a new house pet, and a potential candidate dropped by last night. I was sitting in my living room around 1 a.m. when I observed this fellow swooping around my kitchen. He was not nearly as cute as the pictured here and he was HUGE!!!!!!!! Why are these furry little rodents simply not cute? Does it have something to do with the fact that they sleep upside down?
Amazingly, I did not scream out loud, although I was screaming internally. Quickly I darted into my bedroom, shut (thank God it is there) the door and stuffed everything I could find in every crack above and below the door. I fell into a bat-troubled sleep...
Next morning, I awoke having forgotten my new friend ... but realization dawned. Staggering from my bed in my usual manner, I peeked out the door. Then I realized with horror I was going to have to FIND the bat, and because I am a horrible slob (with, for instance, every jacket I've worn to work the last few weeks strewn over chairs, presenting a perfect napping spot for a bat), it might be rough. I called Bats R Us and they said they'd charge $140 to capture my bat. Then I stepped out into the hall to talk to my neighbor , Ginny. I then observed an icky brown glob attached to my wall up near the ceiling in my entryway.
Eventually, after much hysteria (on my part), Ginny's boyfriend heroically boxed him up like tasty leftovers in a Tupperware container, and we took him downstairs and watched him fly away. He flapped up to a tree to resume his upside-down slumber. Please, Bat, don't return!!! I love all God's creatures , but .....
I have also found that having a bat prompts everyone you know to tell you their bat stories. This is the 3rd of my own. First one was circa 1990 when I lived in a semi-basement hovel on Gorham Street, downstairs from a New-Age psychotherapy center. Second was at my mom's house after my high school reunion (Number five, Jessica).
