A day in the life

of a homeless kitten who has taken over my home ...

Main traits:
-- Paws the size of a polar bear's, promising ginormous size
-- Eight- to nine-foot leaps
-- Random galloping
-- Emitting of incessant strange, jungle-like noises at 5 a.m.
-- Amazing stenches in the litter box that could only come from a kitten's peculiar bowels
-- Adoration of all small objects and ability to lose 12 acorns a day
-- Ability to go from galloping and leaping to deep naps within seconds
Kittens are sort of like brainless Olympic gymnasts, only without tight leotards or Romanian coaches.